Wishful Thinking...

What a perfect day for crying...
It's raining and every raindrop is following my tears.
He's away... And it's been so long since the last time I saw him.
I'm scared. Being here without him makes me nervous, angry or sad... I can't even tell what I'm feeling anymore. I just wanna see him again. Damn it! 

Wishful thinking... 

I just need to be patient. - I say to myself sweeping my tears off my face but they just keep falling again and again...
I miss him. I need him. - That's the truth...

I need him to hug me and say that everything's gonna be alright, make me feel like little girl in his hug, protected from anyone or anything.
It was a cold raining morning. I was sitting in the living room covered with a blanket drinking my favorite tea, eating chocolate and crying.
I was watching our photos in our scrapbook listening to ''Like I'm Gonna Lose You''.
The life just keeps separating the two of us and I'm wondering why? I think it's because you don't know what you have until you lose it. I was afraid of losing him. He said he's mine and I believed in his words with all of my heart but he had to leave. ''The life...'' - he said, ''... I'll be here before you even notice I'm gone.'' 

He lied. I noticed. More than he would even think I did. 

It's so sad that I'm the person who always give oneself up to one person and when that person leaves, everything seems nothing. 

Thousands of people cannot replace the missing of the one you love the most.

The bell is ringing. Who knows how long it has been ringing but I didn't notice it...

Who is now? - I stood up and walked up to the doors.
I wiped my tears off and unlocked the doors. 

...

''Babe... Hey... What's wrong?'' - It was him...His voice got me back out of the dead... 

He hugged me and stroked my hair.
I felt alive again.

...

Hello guys, 

New post is here and I really hope you like it! Please comment down bellow if you did and If you are new here, press that following button there on GFC and... WELCOME TO OUR LITTLE FAMILY, I love you and I hope you'll enjoy being a part of Stalia shippers family! 

I love you all.

Stay alive, xx

See You Again

Hello to all the people out there reading this haha!

I'M SO,SO, SO,SO SORRY I HAVEN'T BEEN HERE FOR A WHILE. I went to a school 4-days trip and I prepared posts for the days I haven't been at home and I thought I've set the Schedule to publish posts when I was away but it didn't work out. So please forgive me, I'm so busy these days because of school assigments and homework. 

Time is passing... Spring, Summer, Autumn and Winter... Every season is coming and bringing something. Spring is bringing us the beautiful spring(ish) colors, blossoms on the trees and everything that goes with that. Summer, oh Summer is bringing us a beautiful sunny weather, going on beach time and no school time. Autumn, well, Autumn is my personaly favorite, my friends. But why? It's the season that's so alike to the reality. Everything's beautiful in reality but it's temporarily. Everything is temporarily just like the beautiful leaves on the trees are. They grow, they get green but then, autumn comes and they suddenly start to fall.

They fall just as we do. We grow, we get beautiful but at the end we die. 

And then? Winter comes. Just like in our lifes after our death.

We might not feel it, 'cuz obviously, I mean... We are death. 

But who sees the cold of the winter, who feels cold winds in winter, who feels lost in white? 

The people we left behind us.

And guys...

I wish you never left and I... I wish you take me with you just to see you one more time, that's all I'm looking for. Just to see you one more time, feel your hug the last time...

My heart isn't the same without you. It's the cold,dark place no one wants to see or feel. So I got pretty much all alone on this world.

I got cold for the people because I don't want to lose them. I don't want to lose anyone else again.

People are selfish so were you! How dare you to left me without you? How dare you? 

I'm mad at you but I'll always love you guys.

I'm missing my old pack. 

My squad. Missing old, good times when everyone was happy and all we needed was to be together and have fun.

I miss those days, man. Miss them so bad that I can't continue with my life. I feel like it's my fault.

You guys, deserve to live. But God takes the best people from our planet first because he can't wait to be with them but He leaves us, here, without you.

Without our warriors, survivors, without our heroes that'll always live in our hearts even when they are not by our side.

''It's been a long day without you my friend and I'll tell you all about it when I see you again...''

Rest In Peace ALLISON ARGENT.

Rest In Peace ERICA REYES. 

Rest In Peace VERNON BOYD.

Rest In Peace AIDEN.

We love you. Always and forever in our hearts!

That was all for today! See you next time guys and don't forget to comment down bellow! Love ya!

Stay alive,xx

Demons

''When you feel my heat

 Look into my eyes 

It's where my demons  hide...
Don't get too close, it's dark inside...''

You know... One thing that happend to you and didn't actually killed you but it left you with huge pain that kills you every day again, again and again, with the sore in your heart like it's breaking over and over again. Something you even feel like you are lost in this world full of people who don't understand you, so you don't trust them, you can't say them what's bothering you and even when the room is full of people you feel lonly but you still smile. And that's the worst you have to do. 
Smile even when you are crying from inside. 
You just want to cry and scream loud and break everything but you can't...
Because they would act like they care but they are just curious, they don't actually care about you, your feelings and your pain.
So you just smile and act like you are happy. 
But your eyes can't hide the pain.
You smile, you hide, you smile, you hide but then...
You burst like an explosion and your eyes start getting darker and darker and you become a monster that people made of you making your feelings collect and collect inside you and they become a big grenade who can't wait no more so you just burst.
And then... They ask what's wrong with you, why are you becoming a monster but they don't realize it's all their fault so you start planning your revenge. Like, not actually revenge but giving them what they deserve. 
God gave you the power you need to punish them and that's your mission, your only goal left in this life... 
You can't go back, you can't kill them inside you, they controll you...
''Don't grow up, it's a TRAP!'' is truth. 
The biggest problem with growing up is realizing that monsters ,we fell they are here , are not under your bed but in your head. 
And...
They are your only friends so you start loving your voidness and that's why people, that's why I became a monster... A monster you'll never understand...
That's why I became void...
Void Stiles...

So hello out there! 

Did you miss me? I didn't post for 2 days... I think. 

And here's the reason...

My school starts on this Monday (O-M-G!) and I realized it's better to post on Monday, Wednesday and Saturday because it's all about QUALITY not QUANTITY because I think I should work harder on these three days than post suck posts every day. I'm going into 9th Grade and this year is our last Middle school year and I really need to work hard. Hope you understand and agree with me. 

And also... I'm preparing you a great COLLAB POST with one of my best girls here on Blogger and I'm so,so,so excided because of that! So get ready guys!

See you on Monday, love ya all! 

Stay alive,xx